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At a booth in the back, three handsome twentysomething guys in button-downs are having beers. They are Dan, Alex, and Marty, budding investment bankers at the same financial firm, which recruited Alex and Marty straight from an Ivy League campus.
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Names and some identifying details have been changed for this story. You could talk to two or three girls at a bar and pick the best one, or you can swipe a couple hundred people a day—the sample size is so much larger. In fact, they can remember whom Alex has slept with in the past week more readily than he can.
Asked what these women are like, he shrugs. As the polar ice caps melt and the earth churns through the Sixth Extinction, another unprecedented phenomenon is taking place, in the realm of sex.
Hookup culture, which has been percolating for about a hundred years, has collided with dating apps, which have acted like a wayward meteor on the now dinosaur-like rituals of courtship.
Dating apps are the free-market economy come to sex. OkCupid soon adopted the function. When there is a surplus of women, or a perceived surplus of women, the whole mating system tends to shift towards short-term dating. Marriages become unstable. Divorces increase. Men are making that shift, and women are forced to go along with it in order to mate at all. We need to puzzle out why women have made more strides in the public arena than in the private arena.
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The study, published in May in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, became a talking point for its surprising conclusion that millennials are having sex with fewer people than Gen X-ers and baby-boomers at the same age.
On a steamy night at Satsko, everyone is Tindering. Or OkCupiding, or Happning, or Hinging. The tables are filled with young women and men drinking sake and beer and intermittently checking their phones and swiping.
At a table in the front, six young women have met up for an after-work drink.
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None of them are in relationships, they say. No one gets hurt—well, not on the surface.