Except…you agreed with your primary partner that Thursday was their day to ensure your quality time. Do you wait two weeks and risk the fizzle, or talk to your partner about making an exception?
When there are more than two, it gets a lot more complicated. Especially in modern society where traditional dating rituals are quickly being deemed old-fashioned and uncool, and people are more inclined to just go with the flow.
Such a thing is not a realistic option with multiple partners, which requires a greater level of transparency upfront and necessitates constant communication. But scheduling is not even the most intense challenge that people who chose to practice non-monogamy find themselves faced with.
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The biggest challenge non-monogamous folks face is rather monstrous, in fact. As it turns out, neither is the case. People who practice non-monogamy are more than aware of the existence of jealousy, and more than capable of experiencing it themselves.
Or with Netflix. Jealousy, while it can be worked with and talked through , is a natural emotion that even those of us who choose to take a non-traditional path still experience. But non-monogamy turns that on its head. Once possession is removed, the love between two or more people is no longer defined by what they will not do with others, but by what they actually feel and have together.
You are not being asked simply to trust that your partner will obey your mutually established rules , but instead to trust in your mutually established love. Trust that a casual tryst will not threaten your love. Trust that even as a secondary or tertiary lover, you are still cared for and respected. Not to knock the merits or challenges of monogamy, but where time management, jealousy and trust are concerned, non-monogamous folk have a bit of a fuller plate, if I must say so myself.
Do not be fooled into believing that the option to love and be loved by more than one human makes non-monogamy easy. It may feel like a more natural state of being, but nevertheless, as with all interpersonal relationships, hard work is not only expected but required. While that does make logical sense, love knows not of logic, and as fate would have it monogamous and non-monogamous people can and frequently do find themselves involved, in love, and in relationships.
Is it easy? Refer to myth two! It requires compromise and understanding.
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Perhaps the parties involved agree that the monogamous partner will continue to practice monogamy while the non-monogamous partner is free to practice a form of non- monogamy. Similarly, perhaps an ordinarily monogamous partner will test and stretch their limits, agreeing to a mostly monogamous relationship with a swingers party here or a threesome there on occasion.
At the end of the day we are all more than the labels we assign ourselves, and people who may seem unlikely to mesh on paper can and do attract. As long as trust, respect and consent are part of the formula, a mono and a poly can surely make it work.
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Since non-monogamous relationships function without the ideas of possession in play, some feel that this means commitment cannot and does not exist. This is not the case. Commitment absolutely can and does exist within non-monogamous relationships. State of the art interface makes it super fast to search and browse the millions sexy picture profiles.
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